Real Talk w. Kane Adams

S1 Ep9 | Guilt vs Shame Part 1

What is the difference between guilt and shame? Is there a difference? Today we're beginning our 2-part series on guilt and shame. People often use the words 'guilt' and 'shame' synonymously, but the two characteristics are very different from each other. Guilt is a warning sign that we've transgressed a moral law, it's a good thing, whereas shame takes that warning sign and connects what we've done to our identity, which is unbelievably detrimental to us and the perception we have of ourselves. Join the conversation!
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Timecodes:
(00:00) Intro(05:34) What is guilt?(16:20) What is shame?(22:36) Some thoughts on trauma
 

S1 Ep8 | The Power of Gratitude

Today we're discussing the power of gratitude. Often, people think of gratitude as merely a fleeting feeling we experience when we think of something good, but gratitude is much more than that. Gratitude is a choice that we make despite the circumstances we're facing - we choose to be grateful. When we choose to be grateful, not only are we humbled, but often we're reminded of our humanity - that all of us are imperfect, all of us are hopelessly lost, yet wonderfully found in Christ. An interesting quote to think about regarding gratitude: "when we know how bad it can get, the good times taste sweet, but when we don't know how bad it can get, even the good times can taste bitter."
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Timecodes:
(00:00) Intro(05:35) Step 1: Choose to be grateful(08:46) Step 2: Detach yourself from comparison(13:36) Step 3: Remember your childhood passions
(17:56) Step 4: Remember your suffering
(25:24) Step 5: Remember the giver

S1 Ep7 | Niceness vs Kindness

Today we're discussing the difference between 'niceness' and 'kindness.' Is there a difference? There most certainly is. Niceness tends to focus on keeping external peace by catering to people's feelings - the goal is to not ruffle any feathers, but keep everyone in a state of 'happiness'. Kindness, on the other hand, focuses on internal peace - to achieve internal peace (ultimately leading to external peace as a by-product), we must tell people the truth, despite their feelings, in order to guide them towards ultimate goodness. Niceness is easy in the short run, but highly detrimental in the long run, whereas kindness may be painful in the short run, but life-giving in the long run. I think we know which characteristic of the two we ought to pursue ;)
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Timecodes:
(00:00) Intro(01:10) Kane's story to bring context(03:38) Nice people are peacekeepers / kind people are peacemakers(13:21) Nice people hide the truth / kind people expose the truth
(19:55) Nice people lack boundaries / kind people are secure in their boundaries
 

S1 Ep6 | Self-Awareness Part 4 - Receiving Feedback

Today we're continuing our 4-part series on self-awareness. Throughout the series, we look at 4 main topics in relation to self-awareness: Internal self-awareness, external self-awareness, self-consciousness and practicing self-awareness.
 
Today, we're discussing practicing self-awareness namely through feedback. How do we practice self-awareness? Firstly, you can't practice self-awareness unless you understand that you need it. Once we understand that we need it, there are three virtues we must attain as we begin our journey of self-awareness: humility, vulnerability and honesty. Then, we discuss practicing self-awareness through feedback. How do we receive feedback in a way that is constructive? How do we deal with honest criticism? Who should we approach for feedback?
 
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Timecodes:
(00:00) Intro
(02:03) The first step when practicing self-awareness
(03:34) Virtue 1: Humility
(05:45) Virtue 2: Vulnerability
(12:50) Virtue 3: Honesty
(16:31) Practicing self-awareness through feedback
(21:25) Tips for giving feedback to others
(26:09) Tips for who to approach for feedback
 

S1 Ep5 | Self-Awareness Part 3 - Self-Consciousness

Today we're continuing our 4-part series on self-awareness. Throughout the series, we look at 4 main topics in relation to self-awareness: Internal self-awareness, external self-awareness, self-consciousness and practicing self-awareness.
 
Today, we're discussing self-consciousness. To be self-conscious is to be uncomfortable and nervous because you are worried about how other people will see you. This is starkly different from self-awareness; self-consciousness is not your friend. We discuss the differences between self-awareness and self-consciousness and how to ensure we are living our lives with self-awareness at the wheel.
 
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Timecodes:
(00:00) Intro
(02:12) What is self-consciousness?
(05:15) Kane's personal self-consciousness
(08:46) How do you find what you're self-conscious about?
(12:12) Differences between self-consciousness and self-awareness
(23:04) The problem with self-consciousness
 

S1 Ep4 | Self-Awareness Part 2 - External Self-Awareness

Today we're continuing our 4-part series on self-awareness. Throughout the series, we look at 4 main topics in relation to self-awareness: Internal self-awareness, external self-awareness, self-consciousness and practicing self-awareness.
 
Today, we're discussing external self-awareness. External self-awareness is about asking yourself the question "what is it like being on the receiving end of me?" External self-awareness is the ability to understand yourself from the perspective of somebody else - how do people really see you? 
 
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Timecodes:
(00:00) Intro
(01:40) What is external self-awareness?
(03:22) Discovering blind spots
(14:00) Blind spots in relation to the tension of relationships
(20:46) Working out whether it's an internal problem with them or an external conflict with you
(23:03) Tips when practicing external self-awareness
 
 

S1 Ep3 | Self-Awareness Part 1 - Internal Self-Awareness

Today we're starting our 4-part series on self-awareness. Throughout the series, we look at 4 main topics in relation to self-awareness: Internal self-awareness, external self-awareness, self-consciousness and practicing self-awareness. Today, we're discussing internal self-awareness. Internal self-awareness is to be aware of your thoughts, habits and behaviours, as well as recognising the underlying beliefs that these thoughts, habits and behaviours come from inside your life.  
 
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Timecodes:
(00:00) Intro(03:59) What is self-awareness?(09:43) Internal self-awareness

S1 Ep2 | Facing Your Fears

Today we're discussing how to face your deepest fears. Everybody experiences fear in some form, whether it's a fear of flying, a fear of relationships, a fear of failure, or even a fear of success. How do we overcome our fears? We talk about three ways to overcome our fears: recognise your fear, realise that you will need to face your fear, and then face it! 
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Timecodes:
(00:00) Intro(06:56) Recognise your fear(11:05) Realise that you'll need to face your fear at some point(17:26) Face your fear

S1 Ep1 | Reduce Your Ambition

Today we're discussing how to navigate through the pressure and anxiety we may experience when dreaming up an audacious goal or vision. How do we work through the pressure of having to 'be' something? How do we work through the pressure of having to achieve an audacious goal to 'prove' something? We discuss three keys to overcoming the pressure and anxiety that are connected to our dreams: Disconnect your dreams from your identity, get realistic about what you want to achieve in life, and reduce your ambition.
 
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Timecodes:
 
(00:00) Intro
(03:18) Disconnect your dreams from your identity
(09:15) Get realistic about what you want to achieve in life
(12:50) Reduce your ambition
 

Real Talk w. Kane Adams (Official Trailer) | S1 Ep0

The official trailer to a brand new seasonal podcast show "Real Talk w. Kane Adams" featuring Kane Adams. On this show, Kane Adams discusses practical therapeutic skills we can implement in our daily lives from a theological perspective.